Has this ever happened to you ? . You get up early morning and if you are anything like me , you immediately switch on your PC and listen to some music . Yesterday something very freaky happened . I got up switched to my morning playlist in winamp . It’s set to be random . I was lying down and imagined that song by Evan and Jaron – “From my head to my Heart” ... and what do you know , it was the song that came on . Towards the end I imagined Blue eyes Blue by Mr.Clapton and it came on…. And the weirdest surprise was that I hummed a song which I tried to locate in my music collection last week but couldn’t find it . Martina McBride’s – “I love you” and voila there it was playing at 8 in the morning when I least expected .Moral of the story . If you waste time at 8 in the morning thinking about your music collection and not about something of consequence , you’d be late to work .Muahahah .
Savior and survivor are two words that sound similar . They sorta rhyme haina . But today I aint writing about the similarity . Im writing about the difference that one insidious ‘savior’ can bring about in a person . Today I am a changed man . I have survived mashallah and I thank Him for everything . Last week Ayesha , the hacker who hacked into my accounts a few months ago , emailed me again .Harassing me because of Huma now !. She emailed huma aswell congratulating her on behalf of Sam and herself .When Huma called to tell me , we both had a good laugh . This girl is so obsessed that she cannot let it go .Hahahaha .And I don’t even know her . I have nothing to loose .
Im surprised that Sam can bring in God and claim ignorance by associating something this trivial to Kaaba , God , Swears and weak promises . This is a sign of weakness .But im glad that Ayesha and Sam are friends because I know she’ll blackmail Sam aswell and then Sam will realize who has she made friends with . Sam deserves her .She needs to learn that there is more to life than lying to oneself and having no faith in those who you claim to love .Im glad I got rid of Sam before I did something stupid , thanx to Ayesha . In a way Ayesha was my savior .Me a survivor . I survived Sam .She came into my life claiming to set everything straight . She claimed to be my savior but she used me to fill her voids and then she fell for the oldest trick in the book .I must admit I really believed her but im glad I didn’t fall for anything Ayesha said . I saw everything for myself in Black and White and then took a decision . Too bad Sam fell hard and rock flat . Sam’s problem will always be one thing . She thinks she’s one step ahead of everyone . This time this hacker rose God knows from where =) and bit her like she had never expected . So when Sam writes to me that she didn’t know , she is infact lying . She gave away her lifeline and mine too and then she claims innocence . This time I wont fall for it . Part of me wants to believe in her , part of me wants to dismiss her . Khair … I wont fall for anyone who wants something from me claiming it’s in my best interest . I will evaluate things for myself and dig my own path .If I fall again , it will be my fault .
So in short ive been my biggest savior . True I expected a lot , I expected the world from strangers but today im better off only because of my own efforts . Today I don’t believe Sam because she will say and write anything to save her ass . She will befriend anyone and everyone if she feels like to make them believe her . I have been guilty of not doing the same . I wish I could be like her . I wish I could lie so profusely .But then In the same breath , I think im better off the way I am .
True I don’t have a bucket load of people claiming to love me , or adore me but im happy with the few I have . How many do we need anyway ??. To keep us happy and content . .. Not many I tell you . You need to feel true to those who you claim to love and that’s it . That’s the only way to sleep peacefully at night . That’s the only thing one needs . This being the prime requirement , others follow .Maslow’s hierarchy of needs doesn’t apply here . Love is a relative term and this cannot be restricted in any sense . Its hardly verbal as we are expected to believe . It’s a way of life . Its accepting others with their faults and their moments of triumph . Its accepting their failures as yours and then working with them to make everything the best way possible . Who are we kidding if we live a pseudo perfect life ? . I know men and women who have lived half their lives hiding behind lies . No one’s gonna die if they live a lie but if they dared for the truth , the possibilities can be limitless . No one lives a sad , depressed life if they live a lie . Quite the contrary . They live a happy life . That’s the way it is . But would they experience Nirvana … you tell me . That’s why we don’t have Heroes anymore
Yesterday . The Sabbatical for some never ends .Sitting across the table was Sidra this time . Talking about poverty , about the future oil impasse and even the abysmal technological advancements .She was quoting figures as if she had learnt them to participate in an argument . I asked her , what does she plan to do about it all . Her eyelids flutter as if trying to make a point and she says , “Im waiting for the right time” . Ive seen too many nation saviors like her , too many pseudo intellectuals who sont walk the walk but she started it so I ended it .I told her she will never amount to anything because she takes it all too lightly . I was a little blunt .OR should I say explicit .She even finds it hard to understand that if I adopt a school in Orangi Town , its because me and my gang want to bring about change in as little a way possible as we can .By the time I was through with her , I had summoned her past as one pretentious attempt to gain attention . She was not exactly enraged but she did sit up and take notice of this man sitting across the table dismissing everything she had done .I hope she decides to do something about it . Ive seen to many men and women afford lip service to the cause and then let it go down the drain .Id hate to see the same happen to her though I feel lm already very late .For my part ive been very laid back for the past few weeks anyway and id like to step up the speed .
Today . She looked pensive but I don’t think she’ll do something of consequence anytime soon . To quote Batool quote Tagore , ‘that i exist is the perpetual surprise called life'. Id be surprised if she takes down these walls and work towards her goals in Life . She is a bright kid . God Speed .
TODAY 
